I saw the old lady today 26/02/2014

• Most of time is not arduous to understand someones pain, but the same time it's so much complicated to out our ego from that spot.. I saw the old lady seated on the footpaths corner rushy road her head was down maybe she slept.Maybe....... There are so many assumptions which is not important. The thing is selfish mind .The inner confessions to all those situations.. In the Henry Sharier Papillon book I read.To eat get coconut or soap for bath is the luxuries thing. which is actually TRUE. If I am little trying to understand the outer real world. Don't know, but somewhere I find me nowhere. Somewhere I see me dead at the very next moment.My mind started to talk about those language, 
• my intuitions throwing them back with the immediate actions like we eat food like we listen music unwarily sometimes. The distance of thought between I am alive and I am going to dead someday for sure is not depended of thoughts if I walk outside.its also depends on walk inside of me.Then yesterday I was thinking about the color of my happiness I even found that clearly it was light red And have been already commenced to apply that in my oeuvre. . I am very fulfill with that intuitive moment. We don't choose color, color choose us.Color choose me.I am not thinking about preparation I never did that before. I try to understand... then I start to break everything but that is the fullness of complications.
• I always consider myself as an emotional but I feel and find myself cleverly separated with all this thing everyone does things for their felicity, so me too, but I have to abide by those.
• humans who yet don't have moments to believe about their happiness that old lady I saw like that.But as I said, I find me emotional so  it was very much complicated situation for me to Next to their own hands .BeCause other side, I know like you know it's not enough, it's not enough  for my happiness too i believe that  i have dead sells in my body and  my workplace is different my priorities and happiness separates me 
• Do you know why those people I feel angels who gave their whole life to them (Baba amte like) they created life but I have so much clarifications between them and me.I have soap for the bath, I have coconut to eat. I have legs, that's why I am afraid to walk for my happiness.But when I i seat it happens with me and then i draw . i am sorry
•  ( about writing things and satisfaction is with the words i don't need to worry about those human being as it is like that women impression on me  but if i draw and paint that thing i am not able to save her conditionally for longer than words can do ......my happiness i find here as an artist)